Locked in a Room with You
by Ri0t-Gurl
Summary: Fangirls.
1. It begins, on a sugar high

A/N: Hahahaha. First Parody, that I actually write down...mwahaha. Anyway…

I own nothing.

But I DO wish I owned a penguin…

If this is bad, don't sue, 'cause I wrote this really late at night on a coffee high.

Ever had one…?

Ok, the point- A few random LotR/HP people were kid/elf napped, and held at gumdrop-point,(GOD I hate those nasty things…)and threw into a locked room. Mwaha. My best friend makes an entrance also.

GOD I'm weird….

THE STORY! MWAHAHAHA!!! (BTW- **BOLD** text is describing action)

Evil author appears in the middle of Elrond's council 

Author: Mwahaha. I come with word from t-

Elrond: Who?

Author: Can I finish?!

Elrond: Hey, you interrupted MY council!!

Author: But HEY! I'm the one writing this buddy!

**Moment or two of silence and horrified looks**

Author: You were saying…?

Legolas: Sweet mother of-

Author: AHEM

Legolas: **Eyes get wide**

Author: Hm…**goes over and grabs Legolas by the collar, then Aragorn, and who could forget Pippin?!**

Come on.

Aragorn: **Gulp**

Author: Mwahahaha…my penguins…?

Penguins: Ya?

Author: Mwah. TO HOGWARTS, MY MINIONS!!!!!

They all disappear 

**They land in The Great Hall**

Snape: AH! NOOOOOO! THE DARK LORD HAS PUUUNNNNIIISSSHHHEEED MEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!

Everyone stares 

Snape: AND NOW EVERYONE STARES AT ME?! MASTER, THIS IS CRUUU-EL!!!!!!!

Me: Holy. Shit. GET YOURSELF TOGETHER YOU GREASY HAIRED-

Moony: (A/N: 'Cause we love him) Shhh….It is not HIS fault he has not discovered Herbal Essence, and he only uses Head 'n Shoulders…..

Me: **Ponders** Hmm…you never cease to amaze me-

Moony: That'll be 10 galleons.

Me:- And pick a hole in my wallet.

Moony: Mwaha.

Padfoot: ('Cause we miss him) Moony, Are you charging for random bits of wisdom that no one really listens to AGAIN?!

Me: ENOUGH! THE ARGUING WILL END…BUT THE AMUSEMENT…

Pippin: She's scarier than Sam when he's hungry…

Penguins : Wanna do it now Boss?

Me: Yeah sure….MWAHAHAHA.

**Whirly stuff, twinkly music, me laughin' my head off…**

**Legolas, Aragorn, Pippin, Snape, Moony and Padfoot land in a small room with no-windows and no doors.**

Pippin: Sit down ya'll…after all, no –ones-

Legolas: By the way, I'm claustrophobic.

Everyone groans 

Legolas: But this is fine, it's big enough, but I'll probably...**Loses consciousness**

Aragorn: Hmmm…

Padfoot: Let's play a game! 

Snape: WHY MEEEEEEE LORD?!?!

Moony: You know, I don't enjoy this much either….

Pippin: Drinks all around!

Pippin is ignored 

Padfoot: OOOH! LET'S PLAY DUCK-DUCK-LILY?!

Pippin: OH! I'VE NEVER PLAYED THAT BEFORE!!!!!

**Lily magically appears.**

Lily: Oh DAMN

Padfoot: **Puppy dog eyes** Do we make you PMS THAT much…?

Lily: Sirius, luv?

Padfoot: Yeah Lils?

Lily: YOU CAN'T MAKE ME PMS!!!!

Moony: Ooooooh, someone got toooooold….

Snape: **sniffs** Is my hair that greasy? IS THAT WHY MY LORD PUNIIISSSHES MEE SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

Lily: Yes-

Snape: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

Moony: AH! WILL THE MADNESS EVER END?!?!?!?!?!?!

Lily: No. But, Remus?

Snape: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Moony: Yes Lily?

Lily: When-

Padfoot: GAME!! GAME GAME GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAME!!!!!

Snape: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Aragorn: **Snores softly**

Pippin: Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz-Yeah, uh-zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz-that-that's it…riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight there………zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Gets disgusted looks 

Pippin: Uh…uh huh…my Mustang JT just got a leak, and I…..tried to fix it but………….whoo-hoo, Hooter's was RIGHT…zzzzzzzzzzzz…..there……

Mwahahahahaha.

Shall I continue?

Yes, it is pointless, I know, but this was for AMUSEMENT

And next chapter will focus on the LotR characters…and my Best friend, mwahahahahahahahaha. Anyway, I know I gave the characters a very modern day, human touch, but DON'T BITE MYT ASS OFF. I KNOW.

Thank you,

Riot Girl


	2. Jessica

Hahahaha. Yay. Ok, to my reviewers-

  Firstly, thank you, secondly-

Psycho-Monkey-I like your name…anyway, thank you for thinking it's so awesome, but really hun, was it THAT GOOD?

Cheekylildevilzzz-Yes. BIIIIIG sugar high, LOL. Thank you for saying 'it was very original.' That means a lot.

THANKS! Oh yeah, I think I need a beta reader, if anyone wants the job…anyway, yet again, I don't own anything.  Especially Goth Barbie, (Jessica,)(her nickname is Goth Barbie. Don't ask.) NOW ON WITH THE CHAPTER

Where we left off- 

_Pippin was saying stuff like- Yeah, my Mustang JT sprung a leak, and I tried to fix it, but Hooter's was riiiight there…_

Miss. Garvey appears as Pippin says- 

Pippin: Yeah, and woo-hoo, that Jessica-

Goth Barbie: HEY! I DON'T WORK AT HOOTER'S!!!

Legolas: **woke up as she said this** o.O

Goth Barbie: H-HEY! I KNOW YOU! YOU'RE THE ONE WITH ALL THE FAN GIRLS!!!

Legolas: Do. Not. Remind. Me.

Goth Barbie: Well you do.

Legolas: Please.

Goth Barbie: Ya-huh.

Legolas: DON'T MAKE ME TURN GREEN LIKE ELROND!!! (LOL that idea belongs to HonestlyRachel, in her story 'Middle Earth and More' read it if you haven't!!)

Aragorn: Nooooooooooooooooo pleeeeeaaaaaaase doooooooooooooooon't…

Pippin: I want beer, dammit.

Lily: LANGUAGE!!!

Padfoot: Pathological fear of cursing.

Snape: WHY LORD?!

Moony: AH STUFF IT!

Author: _As a disembodied voice_:  Who's getting' pissed now? HUH? HUH? HUH!?

Lily: LANGUUUUUAAAAGE!!!!!

Moony: o.O right. Lily. Pills. Now. _To Author:_ **puppy dog eyes**

Me: NOOOOOOO! NOT- THE-EEEEEEEEEEEEYEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!

Gollum: **Appears**;** says in civilized, British tone** Excuse me chap, that's my line, accenting the 's's on words, and if you have issues…

**Big, scary lawyers appear in black.**

Me: **Gulp.**

Gollum: Knew you'd see it my way…**disappears with lawyers.**

Me: They scare me. Mommy…

Everyone, Minus Author: o.O

Goth Barbie: Ok Kayla, your Good Charlotte CD has been taken away hasn't it…?

Me: **Bottom lip quivers**

Goth Barbie: Just like last time…?

Me: Y-y-YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!

Gollum: **Clears throat.**

Me: Oh sorry.

Pause 

Me: Bye.

Goth Barbie: Am I coming over on Saturday?

Me: I think.

Goth Barbie: Ok. Bye.

Me: **Evil grin**. Have fun.

Goth Barbie: You. Suck.

Me: MWAHAHA-**cough cough cough**-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!!

Legolas: I think this is the most time I've ever been ignored…yay.

Goth Barbie: Not for long. I gots orders from Kayla. And if I don't follow them, I get blackmailed.

Legolas: WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO TO ME?!?!?!?!

Goth Barbie: **sits on lap.**

Legolas: Too…close…**faints.**       X____X

Goth Barbie: oOoOoOps………

Pause 

Goth Barbie: OH WELL…PIPPIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN!?!?!?!?!

Pippin: o.O   

 **Gulp**  

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo…….

There. Second Chapter…I should end this eventually….

You guys tell me.

REVIEW!

Pweeze?

If you want to be included in here, include:

Name:

Brief Personality:

Who they want to annoy/ see brought in if he/she's not in here:  (Optional, not used for character, I'm just curious)

Other:  (Also optional)

Ok then. Please have them in by next Friday, so I can continue this quickly.

'Cause we all know how much you want to read it. **Rolls eyes**

Peace.

Ri0t Girl.


	3. Relationshipless

How many times do I tell you I don't own these peoples?! WILL YOU NOT LEAVE ME BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!!!!

Hmmmm…ok, here we go. 

Aragorn: I think I know why Legolas never had a serious-any-relationship before.

Goth Barbie: Duh. Typical man, afraid of commitment

Legolas: X____________________X

Goth Barbie: Pippin?

Pippin: o.O

Goth Barbie: Aw, now I see why Kayla loves you so much. You're so cute!

Pippin: She does?

Goth Barbie: Uh-huh.

Pippin: HA! EVEN THE ELF CAN'T SCORE WITH HER ONLY MEEE-

Goth Barbie: Naw. Only you.

Pippin: ** Sniffs; Hobbit eyes** I AM loved…

Aragorn: Speaking of which, where were you last night?

Pippin: Ok, Aragorn, don't freak out but...Arwen

Aragorn: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?!?!?!?!?!

Mr. Tolkien: **Turns in grave**

Lily: Ah, your…wife, I suppose?

Pippin: **mutters** He wishes…

Sirius: **catcalls**

Moony: **shudders** She's an elf? And a hobbit? Hmmm…I wanna see the kid…

Snape: WHY LORD?! DOES THE PERVERTED-NESS EVER STOP?!?!

Me: No.

Goth Barbie: _To Moony_, I hope to GOD there isn't a kid…_To Me_ AND HOW DO YOU KNOW?!

Me: Jessica, hun, I'm writing this.

Goth Barbie: Oh yeah…oh no…**Gets on knees and bows to space** HAVE MEEEEEEERCYYYYYYYY!!!!!!

Snape: Sheesh. What a baby, huh Lord?

Pause 

Snape: Lord? LORD?! WHY DON'T YOU AAAAAAAAANSWEEEEEEEER?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!

Sirius: Sure…Hmmm...LOOKIE! LOOK WHAT I CAN DO! **Chases tail**

Lily: Hun, you've ALWAYS done that.

Moony: Ya, and you should see him when he's a DOG…

Lily: **Shudders**

Sirius: **Is still trying to figure what Moony just said out**

Goth Barbie: Hmmmm…master?

Me: Yes?

Goth Barbie: Could we…maybe…kinda sorta…

Me: Have music?

Goth Barbie: 0___0 HOW DID YOU KNOW?!?!?!

Me: I know all…

Everyone in room: o.O…X_____X…_____

Pippin: Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Me: Good Charlotte?

Goth Barbie: ONLY IF IT'S RIOT GIRL!!!!!

**CD Player appears out of no-where.**

Goth Barbie: OH MY GOOOD JOOOOEEEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Pippin: -_- Well FINE…but I thought you loved ME!

Goth Barbie: Wha? Oh-yeah…{}…Yeah sure…Bob?...Marley?…

Pippin: PIPPIN!!!!!!!!!!!! ___

Goth Barbie: Oh right…tee hee…

CD Player: She's got Tattoos, and piercings…

Legolas: Wha? X___X. NOT YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUU!!!!

Goth Barbie: MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!

Legolas: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Goth Barbie: MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Legolas: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUU!!!!

Goth Barbie: MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Legolas: YOOOOOUUUUU-

Pippin: PIIIIIIIPPIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN!!!!!

Everyone Else: O.o

Pippin: What?!

Moony: I will tell you-

Pippin: **Opens mouth**

Moony: If you pay me 10 galleons

Pippin: **Shuts it.**

Moony: Well FOINE!!!!(Pronounced-Foy-n)

Lily & Sirius: PILLS REMUS!!!

Moony: MAKE ME!

Lily: Fine.

Moony: YOU'LL NEVA TAKE ME ALIIIIIIV-**Is cut off when Lily kisses him.**

Sirius: X_X What. The. FUCK?!?!  
  


Lily and Remus: **Start to make out**

CD Player: Police Rescue FBI she wants a ri0t she wants a ri0t…

Goth Barbie: SING IT TO ME JOEL!

Gets stares from everyone but Lily and Remus 

Legolas: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! One less FANGIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (A/N: Heeeee HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE...wha's this button do...?)

Goth Barbie: I never said that…

Legolas: **moans**

Aragorn: Pippin, Peregrin, my dear Pip…

Pippin: Yeah Aragorn?

Aragorn: DID YOU HAVE BLOODY SEX WITH MY WIFE?!?!?!?!!??!!?!?!

Goth Barbie: You lied! You said she wasn't your wife!

Aragorn: Yet

Pippin:  No, I didn't have sex with your WIFE…

Just Arwen………………………………………………………………………..DON'T KILL MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me: DON'T KILL HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Or I will turn you into a bright purple pink polka dotted monster in a yello itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikini!!!!!!! I'M THE ONE WRITIN' THIS BUDDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

CD Player: Don't you know that all I really want is yo-** Batteries die out**

Goth Barbie: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bwahahahahahaha. Really long chapter. No worries. I'll add you peoples in. You'll have your own chapter...maybe.

Anyway, keep reviewing!!!


	4. Who's Eowyn?

Mwahahahaha.

Jo, this is your chapter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, I don't own anything, and Jo owns Jo. And Jessica owns Herself too.

Yay for Jo, my most loyal-est-est reviewer.

Gollum: AHEM

Me: Sorry.

NOW THE CHAPTER-

Ok, Profile….

Name: Jo/Joe (Multiple personality disorder….?)JOKE!

Personality: Random, Insane, likes to laugh diabolically, plan the world doom

SHE WILL ANNOY LEGOLAS.

OMG JESSICA HAS COMPETITION

NOOOOOOOWWWWWWWW The Chapter…

Legolas: Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh…

Jo: Hangover?

Goth Barbie: WHO ARE YOU?!

Jo: I'm Jo. Mwahahahahahaha.  The author invited meeeeeeeses.

Gollum: LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERSSSSSS!!!! THE AUTHOR HASN'T LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAARNED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! 

Jo: JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW-

Sirius: FIIIIISSSSHHHIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

Everyone: o.O

Legolas: Why me?

Jo: You are the chosen one, Obi-Wan  (LOL I don't watch Star Wars, I just put that in, so don't bite my ass off for any mistakes.)

Legolas: o____o

Pippin: **sniff sniff** What about me…?

Goth Barbie: Yeah, uh huh, sure Bob…

Pippin: IT'S PEREGRIN –I MEAN PIPPIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Goth Barbie: DON'T TOY WITH MY EMOTIONS BOB!!! **Is talking to CD Player** WHY  DON'T YOU AAAAAAANSWEEEEEEEEEEER?!?!?!?!?!?!

Pippin: I am unloved.

Me: Aw Pip, I love you.

Pippin: Really?

Me: Aw I love you, you're so cuuuuute!!! I won't have sex with you like Arwen, 'cause I'm still waitin' for Benji, but ya.

Pippin: Oh that makes me feel better.

Me: Only for you.

Goth Barbie: WHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Jo: Leeeeeegooooooooolaaaaaassssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!

Legolas: Do I WANT to know?

Jo: Uh huh.

Legolas: **sighs** What?

Jo: **Giggles** I luv Sirius!!!!!!!!!

Sirius: **Looks her over.** And I love you too.

Jo: ^____________________^!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!! **Glomps**

CD Player: ..Blurble…

Goth Barbie: BLUUUURBLE?!?! THAT'S ALL I GET?!?!?!?!?!

Snape: LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORD?!?!?!?!

Lily: Mmmmmmmm…

Remus: Yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmmmmm…

Sirius: Right-y-o.

Aragorn: Pippin?

Pippin: X_X Y-yea?

Aragorn: Run

Pippin: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!!!!!!!!!  X______________X!!!!!

Legolas: ^_^ Jealous.

Aragorn: **Stops** No you HAVEN'T…

Legolas: Haven't what?

Aragorn: **Growls**

Legolas: o.O ok, Maybe, once…?

Arwen: Ouch.

Aragorn: I KNEW I shoulda picked Eowyn…

Pippin: Nuh-uh

Arwen: Who's EOWYN, luv?

Aragorn: ()…N-no one dear…

Arwen: Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr…

Aragorn: **Gulp** Hee hee hee…

Jo: Mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha…

Legolas: X__X

Jo: COME MY MINIONS!!!!

Legolas: Which would be who?

Jo: Mwahahaha. You. 

There ya go, Jo.

How did ya like it?


	5. I don't mind RRated shit

I own nothing, but I would own GC if I could…

Bleh. I start school tomorrow, so I might not be able to update as fast, but I'll try!

Sweet mother of GOD…the year is almost over, school will end soon. But I still have to go through more of its shit.

But anyway, on a lighter note…

_Where we were:_

_Legolas: Y-your minions? Who would they be?_

_Jo: You._

Mwahahahahahaha.

Legolas: M-me?

Jo: You.

Legolas: Are you sure?

Jo: Positive. I TOLD you, you were the chosen one, Obi-Wan…

Legolas: o.O Err…right

Pippin: I'm all alone, there's no one here besiiiiiiiiide me, no one to-

Goth Barbie: NO! YOU CANNOT REPLACE JOEL SO DON'T EVEN TRY, HALF-PINT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pippin: _ Er, right.

Jo: I will hold you hostage, Obi-Wan, and all the fan girls will bow down to me, as I have you. I shall then get ransom from Elrond. And your father-

Legolas:  I never knew my faaaather!!!!!!!!!!!

Lily: **Has finally stopped snogging Moony** Ah suck it up ya wimp.

Legolas: **Sniff Sniff** Yes ma'am.

Fangirls: Awwwwwwwwwwww…

Legolas: **Gulp**

Arwen: WHO IS EOWYN?!

Aragorn: Um-

Pippin: Some chick he nailed in Rohan.

Arwen: Oh REALLY!?

Aragorn: WHAAAAAAT?! YOU CAN GET LAID BY LEGOLAS AND PIPPIN-

Arwen: And Boromir

Aragorn: o.O   Ok, I have now decided to become a homosexual.

Arwen: You mean I don't have to have sex with you?

Aragorn: No. NO! 

Arwen: Legolas…? Pippin…?

Me: WOAH! LET'S KEEP THIS PG-13!!

Jo: Aren't you the one writing this R-Rated shit?

Me: -_- Oh right.

Sirius: Oh Jooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!?!?!

Jo: Yes Siri?

Sirius: I don't mind R-Rated shit.

Jo: Miss Master, can you change the rating, purty pweeze, 'cause I am your best-est reviewer?

Gollum: AHEM

Me: Riiiiight. Yeah sure.

Sirius: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

Jo: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

Arwen: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!

Me: Oh no…

Really short chapter, but oh well.

Jo, please, tell me if this is ok, and what ya want to do next. Also, the rating HAS CHANGED.

Alright, I think that's it, tell me if I missed anything.

  
Ya see that button riiiiight, no, to the left, no down..NO! DO NOT CLICK THE 'X' BUTTON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That's it.

FEED THAT BUTTON!!!!

Rock on,

Riot Girl


	6. Fangirls DAMN I'm evil

Author Note: If I owned anything, would it really be these characters?

…

…

Ok, never mind, don't answer that…

Ch. 6…

Oh yeah, Goth Barbie, she is Jessica, she owns herself, maybe…no, wait the monkeys own her…

The story…

Jo: So, now that the rating is R…

Sirius: Mwahahahahahaha

Goth Barbie: OK, Pippin, I LIKE you and all, but Kayla, she…ok, the deal is, I LOVE LEGGY!!!

Legolas: o.O Oh no…

Goth Barbie: Leeeeegoooolaaaaassssss!!!!!!!!!!!!

Legolas: **Gulp** A-another f-fangirl?

Snape: Do _I_ have fangirls?

Moony: **Snorts** You. Wish.

Snape: And YOU do?!

Moony: Uh, Ya?

Me: Myself being one of them.

Goth Barbie: MEEE TOOOOO!!!!

Legolas: A-

Goth Barbie: But I love you mooooooore!!!

Pippin: **Cute Hobbit Eyes**

Me: Aw, I love you too…

Pippin: XD

Me: ...But the whole animal magnetism…

Pippin: L (A/N: Wow. Word IS cool…)

Goth Barbie: Is the CD Player working?

Me: No.

Goth Barbie: Why?

Me: Because I can't be…NICE…can I?

Goth Barbie: Oh…right…

Me: Oh, ow, that hurts.

Goth Barbie: All 'cause MONKEYS ARE BETTER!

Me: PENGUINS!

Goth Barbie:  MOOOONKEEEEYYYYS!!!!!

Me:  PEEEEEENGUUUUUUUUIIIIIIINZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!!

Goth Barbie: Rock!

Me: Paper!

Goth Barbie: Scissors!

Me: Mary!

Goth Barbie: Had!

Me: A little lamb!

Goth Barbie: -_-() You cheated.

Me: 'Cause I can.

Goth Barbie:  o.o. And the teachers say they like you.

Me: All cause I'm special.

Goth Barbie: Riiiight. Special. ** Cough Cough** of COURSE you are.

Me: y- HEY!

Moony: The story…?

Me: Oh right!

Moony: Sometimes I serious-

Padfoot: Thaaaaaaat's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!

Goth Barbie: Err…right.

Snape: Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasssssster!!! WHY DO I HAVE NO FANGIRLS?!?!?!

Lily: Cause you're an ugly, greasy git?

Snape: NO…maybe…

Lily: **Cough** Denial **Cough**

Voldie: Oh REEEEEEEAAAAAALLY, Evans?

Sauron: Yeah-YEAH WHAT HE SAID!!!!

Aragorn: Holy Fuck…

Sorry! I have been so damn preoccupied…oh well.  Pray for me, so I can get this shit done! PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! I NEED OTHER PEOPLES OPINIONS!!!!!!!!!!

Also-

I have a fuckin book report to do, so that means MORE GODDAMN DELAY!  
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And I know this is short, but they'll get shorter and shorter unless people REVIEW, DAMMIT.

Peace.

Kayla 


	7. Fangirls, Fangirls, whatcha gonna do, wh...

Thank you Sirius gyal for reviewing, I'm glad you like it.

I saw Cold Mountain, which ROCKS, it kicks ass too!!!!!!

GO SEE IT.

YOU.

NOW.

And pweeze, stop acting like I am making money off this, 'cause I assure you that YOU ain't payin me, so I suppose no one is. 

Pippin: I like cheese, I like cheese…

Arwen: o.O Right. Legolas?

Legolas: Ya?

Goth Barbie: NO! MY LEGGY. BACK. OFF. BITCH.

Arwen: Oh really?

Legolas: Not another catfight

Sirius Gyal: Mreow.

Sirius: Hahahahahahaha!!LOOKIE! MY NAME'S UP THERE!

Lily: Breathe, breathe and it'll aaaaaall go away.

Arwen: MINE!

Goth Barbie: MINE!

Arwen: MINE!

Goth Barbie: MINE!

Arwen: YOURS!

Goth Barbie: Mine! HA!

Arwen: -_-() Shit. It always works with Aragorn…

Aragorn: And then we like TOTALLY went to the mall! Like omigosh!!!!

Sirius: Jo?

Jo: Sirius?

Sirius: **Starts to snog Jo** (A/N: Ha. I'm too nice)

Goth Barbie: Hmm…brilliant example….Leggy…?

Legolas: X__X

Goth Barbie: Aw, how cute, he's sleeping…

Fangirls: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwww…

Random Dude in my Head: YAY FOR VOLDIE!

Voldie: Speaking of which

Snape: Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaassssster, my preciousssssssssssssssssss…

Voldie: EW YOU HOMO!

Aragorn: HEY DON'T BE DISSIN' _US_ MISTER SO LAST SEASON!!!

Sauron: HE'S supposed to be a freakin' KING

Sirius: Riiiiight there…

Jo: ^_^

Sirius Gyal: MINE! SIRI IS MIIIINE!!!!

Jo: MINE!

Sirius Gyal: MIIIIIINE!!!!!

Jo: YOURS

Sirius Gyal: HA!

Jo: o.O Dammit…

Sirius Gyal: Siiiiiiriiii….?

Voldie: STOP IT SNAPE! YOU CANNOT HUMP MY LEG!

Legolas: **Woke up as he said this** o.O **Faints.**

Fangirls: YOU HURT LEGGY!

Me: Muahaha. I shall rule yoooouuu!!!!!!

Goth Abrbie: GET HIM!!!!!

Mwahahahaha. A cliffhanger for all ya'll Legolas fans.

Anyway, review, and I need Ideas of torture, fangirls…?

FEED THE BUTTON RIGHT THERE-

**NO! DO NOT CLICK THE ESCAPE BUTTON!**

**NO! NOT THE 'X' BUTTON EITHER!!!**

**THE 'GO' BUTTON YOU MORON!!!!!!!**


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